Here enlies our issues, child has only visited 4 times since February 4, 2012. By continuing to use this site you consent to the use of cookies on your device as described in our cookie policy unless you have disabled them. Put your child’s needs before your need to lash out at your ex-spouse. I am however, a divorced mom, a high school teacher of at risk youth, and a family mediator. For example, the Court could determine that you are no longer eligible for child support. Pennsylvania divorce attorney Amy Humbert. So, if your young child doesn’t feel like visiting, or doesn’t want to leave mom behind, you really need to encourage – and even require – that she visit with her dad as scheduled. Don’t allow hard feelings and conflict with your ex to harm your child. If there are major issues that affect your child’s safety or welfare, you should contact an attorney in order to decide if it makes sense to seek a modification of visitation or custody. For the visiting parent, they may be accused of inappropriate conduct in the child’s presence if they argue with the other parent over visitation. Long Island Divorce: Should I Fight To Keep The House? Keep in mind that your child missing scheduled visitation with your co-parent could put you and your family in a legal bind. First, let me tell you, I am NOT a lawyer and I cannot give you legal advice. If a child is too ill or sick to visit, or a teenager is refusing to visit the other parent, it is important that you communicate the situation in a timely matter with the other parent. Godard v Godard, 2015 ONCA 568Shared custody or access arrangements involving pre-teens can be a challenge when the child insists that they do not want to see the other parent. Your child's request to live with your ex doesn’t have to be seen as a negative evaluation of who you are as a person or a parent. Because the custodial parent typically cannot make a teenager visit as ordered, then the court is unlikely to find the parent in contempt of court for failing to comply with a visitation order. Children not wanting to spend time with their other parent can put the custodial parent in a precarious catch 22. You may want a provision in your plan about how the parents will communicate. I love it! You can put him or her in the car. Badmouth the other parent. Divorce can strain relationships for years. No matter the reason for not wanting to see their other parent, custodial parents are responsible for making sure that their child sees their other parent. It is important to note that Courts want both parents to be involved in their children’s life. 16-Year-Old Wants to Refuse Visitation With the Non-Custodial Parent My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Georgia. If you are a custodial parent, you should encourage the relationship between your child and the non-custodial parent. Badmouthing your co-parent in front of your child or interrogating your child about the visitation once they get home could influence your child's desire to be with their other parent. This is how children learn responsibility and that what they want can’t always come first. Teen left the custodial parent house in the middle of the night. For the visiting parent, they may be accused of inappropriate conduct in the child’s presence if they argue with the other parent over visitation. This is a … In nearly any situation like this, properly notifying your co-parent and documenting what occurred is key. adolescents, trips to a non-custodial parent's home, often hundreds if not thousands of miles away, usually doesn't make it to the top of their "to do" list. Care for the children is a significant concern. Keep the conversation positive when you and your child speak about these visits, helping your child to look forward to that time instead of dread it. Update: He refuses to go because he has asthma, there is a court order not tosmoke around him...she will not comply. She doesn't/hasn't supported visitation for a long time. David P. Badanes, Esq. If there is an order issued and they aren't compling with it, you can go to the local police with order in hand and they will escort you to pick up the child. For the past 2 summers I've paid for ALL airline tickets, and I will do it again just to see my kids. Holidays and vacations. If the reason does not directly impact their safety or well-being, your child should attend visitations. You should consider allowing the distanced parent to visit so the child doesn't have to travel as frequently. When it's your turn to respond, do so with kindness and understanding. For the custodial parent, they may be accused of interfering with the other parent’s visitation if the child does not go. Making a child reasonably available doesn’t mean that one parent has to force the visit or drag a child kicking and screaming from one car to the other. What to Do When Your Child is Refusing to Visit the Other Parent One particular instance in which this can become challenging is if your child doesn't want to comply with your visitation schedule and begins refusing to see their other parent. Of course not, because as a parent, you sometimes have to make your children do things that they don’t necessarily want to do. Ask why he or she does not wish to visit with the non-custodial parent. It should not just be because they are “bored”. Non-custodial parents can have a difficult time staying connected during the teen years - teens certainly aren't known for being open with their parents! If you are the custodial parent or managing conservator, you are held responsible for complying with the visitation order. If there is none, it is not illegal for the custodial parent to refuse visitation. The other side of this equation relates to what the custodial parent should do if the child does not want to see the other parent. Custodial parent lives in Texas. Although, you are required to follow a Court’s Order, there is also a “reasonableness” and common-sense factor. Teen left to the parent house that promote the school party. It should not just be because they are “bored”. Perhaps they will agree to limit your time there with a good reason. Author and therapist Sam J. Buser has written a … When Much of what is true for the parent with physical custody is also true for the noncustodial parent. However, the Court found that the desire of the child not to visit with the other parent remains subject to review by the Court and determination of what is in the child’s best interest must be made in any other modification or alteration of visitation rights. There is no provision in Ohio law that allows a minor child to decide that she is not going to comply with the court-ordered visitation. A 16 year old is a completely different story. Keep transitions short, sweet, and reassuring. Divorce Divorced Parents: Kids Should Decide Where They Live/Custody Divorce can be ugly, but it doesn't have to be ugly for the kids. If you’re having a hard time viewing your child's request objectively, talk with a friend or counselor about how you can separate your child’s request from your identity as a parent. If the opposite is happening—even if it's what the child wants—courts may not look as favorably upon the parent who appears to be preventing visitations. During transition times, be sure to stay calm. If your state is similar to Pennsylvania, then the court should hold the custodial parent responsible for ensuring the minor child/children see the noncustodial parents according the … Teenagers are known to push their parents' buttons and try to call the shots, but legally speaking, in most states, teenagers under 18 don't have a say in whether or not they follow the visitation schedule. What will the judge do when a teenager refuses to visit the non-custodial parent? However, a court WILL order that both the child and parent go to counseling to find out what the reason is to wanting a severance of relationship with the parent. at david@dbnylaw.com. Parenting: Dads and Teens often Struggle with their Relationship after the Divorce. Your attorney will be the best person to seek direct guidance from when faced with this issue. Decide how you'll divvy up these occasions. Your viewpoint as a teen will be taken into account, but it will only be one it many factors considered. A custodial parent is obligated to let the non-custodial visit the child if there is visitation schedule in place. Parents must communicate with each other about the teenager. 23 Comments. If you have an agreement or court order that says your partner has access rights, your child must usually go on the visit. 1. Some children in these cases do not want to visit with their non-custodial parent. Non-custodial parents still remain obligated to pay a proportion of the costs involved in raising the child. Any separation or divorce involving children will result in a custody order and visitation schedule. The custodial parent’s attorney has a … Miscommunication parent disagree wether the teen should go to a school party or celebrate a family's birthday. Often there has been a history of domestic violence, substance abuse or the non-custodial parent has emotional or physiological problems which the child is reacting to. When you are an adult you can cut off anyone you like. I think all that non-support has finally come to fruition. See for yourself how the OFW toolset can transform your co-parenting. While their desire not to see the other parent may be totally out of your control, the consequences of your child refusing to attend visitations could impact your whole family. As the residential parent, you have an affirmative duty to encourage her to visit with her father even if she doesn't want to go. A custodial parent is obligated to let the non-custodial visit the child if there is visitation schedule in place. physical abuse – then you should take action in court immediately. You should not just simply stop visitation. Thoughtfully consider your child's opinions, but remember that you are the one in charge. Posted Nov 02, 2012 She wants me to email him and tell him all the reasons she doesn't want to go. A custodial parent is obligated to let the non-custodial visit the child if there is visitation schedule in place. Today I am going to talk to you about what to do if your child does not want to visit with their other parent. Explaining Visitation to Children. Can the judge tell the custodial parent that they have to MAKE the kid go? It does not mean you’re uncaring, unfit or not present. Non-payment of child support is not often considered a reason to limit kids' time with their non-custodial parent. There may be real problems with visitation that lead to a child's refusal to go. As your teenager gets older, both parents need to discuss future goals about education, work and other post-high school plans with the teenager. Visiting the non-custodial parent–assuming the child really doesn’t want to visit and also assuming there’s no abuse going on–is one of those things the courts should be forcing upon the children and custodial parent. In some cases, it's easiest to align the child's visits with holidays and school breaks to avoid disrupting their schedule. If your teenager doesn’t want to have parenting time with the other parent, you should try to determine the reasons why. If using the OFW Calendar to track parenting time, you can create a journal entry to document changes to the regular parenting schedule such as missed visitations. The judge ordered the visitation and they expect their orders to be followed. You can help encourage your child to go, however, and ask them to try and schedule plans around at least some of the time designated to visit the other parent.